Falling Slowly
by shmulia
Summary: Root has a tendency to turn up unexpectedly in Shaw's life. Shaw's not really sure what to make of that. (Shaw POV, canon compliant, seasons 1-3)


You don't fall in love easily.

You don't feel anything easily, though. Except anger. But that's a special feeling, one that you hold on to because it keeps you alive.

A little girl once told you that you _do_ have feelings, but the volume's turned way down. It's a pretty good explanation, actually. Better than you could have described it. Because you do feel things, tiny twinges of emotion which don't rule your head, but you can't quite always ignore.

Especially when it comes to _her._

At first she's just another bad guy. There's a taser, an iron, some cable ties – all in a day's work, really. She leaves before the fun starts thanks to Agent Wilson's arrival, and you aren't sure if you're pleased that you aren't about to be tortured, or slightly disappointed.

No matter; there's a friend you need to avenge, and the next thing you know you've faked your own death and have left two men in a road without a car.

But she's like a ghost, haunting your thoughts, and when you see her picture placed neatly on the board in Finch's library when you turn up unexpectedly, you decide that the only way you're going to get her out of your head is to find her – revenge may not be the most sensible goal, but it's one you know you're good at.

Somehow when you find her in a truck, you end up saving her (this time _she's_ tied to a chair, and the irony doesn't escape you), and she slips out of your fingers into the psychiatric facility Finch puts her in.

Never mind. Now you have a job; there are numbers to save, and a dog to pet. You have other priorities than thinking about Root.

And then, once again, there's an incident with a taser, and you wake up tied to a steering wheel. She talks about trust, and you press a knife against her throat; really, it's only fair after the multiple tasings she's given you at this point.

You work surprisingly well as a team; she doesn't let you down, and by the end of it you're blindly trusting the information she gives you. When you don't end up dead, you're slightly shocked, but less so than Root is when you throw a punch at her and knock her out.

You don't visit her during her confinement in the library. But then, all of a sudden, you need her. Well, the team needs her, but right now that's the same thing. Finch takes some convincing, but after Carter's death, you need all the help you can get to find Reese before the worst can happen.

When it all works out – as best it can, given the circumstances – you're as surprised as Finch is when Root takes up residence in the library of her own free will. But you're certainly not _unhappy_ about it. A fact which you would deny should anyone ask you (not that they ever would, of course).

Root is full of surprises, you learn. She turns up out of the blue to save you, Finch and Claypool, your latest number, wielding two guns and a smirk. You're impressed, despite yourself.

She gives you the chance to escape, and once the door has shut behind you it's the last time you'll see her for a while. You don't know it then, of course, but when she turns up months later with a scar behind her ear and a smile lighting up her doe-eyes, it feels like it's been forever. And then she's gone again, and you don't hear from her until you get a phone call in the midst of Vigilance attacking you, an apology from Root about leaking your information to the people currently trying to kill you.

You know she did it for a good reason. That fact doesn't stop you wanting to punch her again.

She slips away again, and then a motorcycle drives up to you and Reese behind a building, and you have to admit that she looks damn good in a motorcycle jacket. One trip to Alaska later, and somehow the two of you wind up in a bar in Miami, sipping cocktails as bodies surround you.

It's not exactly a date, but it doesn't feel too far from it.

You're ready for a steak, but you're not in the least bit surprised when Root turns, gives you that little smile of hers, and tells you that she has to leave. On her own. There's a new number to save, and you're going to be needed somewhere else.

You don't know if you're disappointed because that steak is better than sex and you're _starving_ , or because of the loss of Root's company.

... It's probably the steak, you tell yourself.

The frequency of her appearances is increasing, however; when she pulls you and Reese aside one day, you're not entirely surprised. Root's good at popping up out of nowhere. It's an odd talent, but one you kind of admire. Kind of.

But now there's more to your job than saving or stopping the number of the day; Samaritan is up and running in New York, which means that every move needs to be thought through to keep its eyes off you. And suddenly Grace needs to be saved, and your focus is on that while Root's is clearly on the new threat to her God.

She stays behind with machines while you and Reese go to find Grace. You're getting used to her short appearances, but it sucks when she abandons a mission, even when you know it's for a good reason. Despite her past, Root's now a useful ally. And the more allies, the better, right?

You're not, however, used to her arranging meetings with you and Reese. She introduces you to her own little team of computer nerds – you can't help but think she's her own, slightly more violent version of Finch when you see them – and then sends you away to do some recon.

Your surveillance leads you to find Control in a meeting, and the only thing that keeps you from firing a shot at her is Root telling you not to. You _know_ that Control isn't an ally, and maybe a bullet would be the best thing for her – the scar behind Root's ear reasserts that belief – but you've learned that the machine sees a bigger picture, and right now trusting Root might be the best way to help Finch. Reese turns up to help you, and the two of you continue the mission, without her.

Reese is a great partner, but he doesn't shoot with two guns often.

You get another phone call from her, this one less cryptic than usual. A flicker of worry shoots up you when Root says she's going into Samaritan's facility alone, and you're slightly relieved when she asks you to meet her there. When you find her, you incapacitate a security guard threatening her.

It's not the weirdest meeting the two of you have had. You think that says a lot about you.

You infiltrate Samaritan's facility together, and your suggested plan of using explosives is shot down. You're not entirely sure what Root is doing, but in the middle of enemy territory, going against a seemingly straightforward plan doesn't seem like a good idea; and, in all honesty, you trust Root. Samaritan is as much a threat to her as it is to you - maybe more so as it threatens the Machine, her God. But it's not only that; you know you two make a good team, and you trust her to have your back.

At least, so long as you're on the same side.

The Machine tells Root you're in danger, and you leave immediately. The car ride is tense as Root calls Finch to tell him the library isn't safe. She explains everything, and there's a spark of dread within you as she explains how she's fooled Samaritan. If there's one thing working for Finch has taught you, it's that no machine is completely safe from tampering, and the new identities Root is providing for them may only be safe for a short time.

When she hangs up, she pulls up alongside a busy road, and gets out of the car. You follow her as she moves to the back, popping open the trunk and pulling out a brown envelope. She turns and hands it to you, a grave look on her face.

"This is your new identity. It should keep you safe. You have to become her, Sameen, live her life completely. I don't know for how long – until we have a chance to bring Samaritan down," she says. You slide the envelope under your jacket and nod.

"Guess we won't see each other for a while then, huh?" you say. Root half smiles at you as she tilts her head.

"Well, you never know. Life has a funny way of throwing us together, I find."

She turns and walks away from you, and you do the same to her. You don't see her stop and look back at you as you turn the corner, but you're thinking about her as you leave.

She's hot, and she's good with guns, and there's just something about her which has, to continue Gen's analogy, slowly been turning the volume up on one emotion in particular.

You don't fall in love easily, but that doesn't mean you don't stumble into it slowly, oh so slowly. It's just that you only consider that you may actually _like_ Root when she disappears again into the crowds of New York, and you have to follow suit.

But Root has a tendency to reappear in your life. You hope she does again soon.


End file.
